Yes.... this is called the "loudness wars". It's actually not a simple issue... i has a lot to do with mixing very very well and then using some tools to bring the sound to a certain point.
I'll skip the mixing part.. let's assume your mix is now perfect. If it's perfect.. it should not be loud yet. From there... take a bus compressor and slightly compress to your taste to try to "glue" it together. This just means your taking away some of it's dynamic range so it's a little more consistent with commercial releases (which are usually glued very tightly together depending on the song). Loud parts aren't much louder than soft parts anymore, which the ear enjoys sometimes. Next (the most important part)... take a limiter and pull the threshold down as far as needed to get it as loud as you need it to me.
That's it really in a nutshell. There's a WHOLE lot more to this point... but that's the raw basics of what you need ot know now to at least be comparable to the loud beats your buddy hears on the internet. This will let you compete. Just remember to keep your mixes low like you're already doing. Don't try to get your loudness on the mix!! lol.. ever. It will sound like trash. Get a nice balanced low mix, and then use those two tools to bring the overall sound level up.