If you even care.

_SG_

_SG_

It's All In The Beat
I kill em' then peel em' walking like a sicilian villian
This brave bastard will shatter your bones, divide them into billions
You foward fiction, fallacies that you dress up as reality
Enabling fables will only sustain the pain from the bullet's anatomy

War casualitis, are likey to arrive if you survive the first wave
If only you would of behaved, I wouldn't have to be so sly with my blades
Nope, no thoughts or talks of aks that are ready to spray
Just verses that converse with your nervous system leaving you on edge for days

There's no backup on the way no teams to help you redeem, just bloodly scenes
And audio of angry cries and your lies that ends with desperate screams
Just infrared beams that creep through the blood soaked seams
Revisitin' demons that gleam while we appear from your darkest dreams

Envokin' vulcan flames that we shower on the dead and battered slain
Travel through your head like the countless sensories in your brain
Mercin', smirkin' with eyes like a serpent who kills over and over but never the same
I hurt your turf, dangerous for the earth, lethal burns slow like acid rain
 
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Yeah I didn't spellcheck this lol, most of the sh!t I type is done quickly in notepad. Sorry bout that.
 
It's simply a reference, maybe I should of bolded the word "like a sicilian" lol. I'm puerto rican so yeah.. I"m gonna post another verse in this thread there's no real reason to make a whole other thread for the second verse. Oh yeah if you dislike anything let me know, I want to improve as much as I can because once I get my production right I'm going to start recording, hopefully.
 
i think the verse is all agression and little real substance...i still like it, it's just not my preferred style...of course most of my verses with the most substance seriously lack agression...

think of some of the classic wu tang verses...there's a good balance of aggression and substance if i ever heard it...
 
yeah, that pretty much sums it up...not to a horrific degree though....i'm thinking that the lines are a little long (no idea how your flow is though) you have pretty nice beats, i think that this would work in audio...
 
Yeah I think of this as a verse similar to a Pun track, just one where he's talking about how he could f*ck you up. It was meant to be real agressive. Although I've got to admit I've been straying from verses with deep meaning lately, anyway thanks for the feed back.

Second verse:

My logic's absurd like a thundering herd of exposed nerves forged to burn
A bit Flawed so they constantly concern over what I earn
Ashes still burn, synapses of the scenario, death ensues
Then it's game over,another complex defeated by simple rules

Slice your cerebral, motor skills become more erratic yet less acceptable
Hollow tipped, my heinous words depletes your forces to decimals
Even In my optimistic prime I show signs of a deception's charm
My army marches with a G.I Flow then shows cobra's fang after we disarm

The urgent insurgent, merchant of verses that I'd be glad to disperse
The diverse vocab that I reveal it's so surreal when I lurk
Many hungry for the guns they envision, Not me I already got ammunition
it's the flow that pierces with precision when I perform surgical incisions

Surge through the veins I maintain the incentive to keep mercin'
Battle armor worn, born war torn but I'm still smirking'
Never defect, I'm rhymin' for respect above all to see
The name implies I come lethally, for me luck's no necessity
 
that's what i'm talking about! you don't need to be deep and poetic to have substance...that verse was much thicker than the first...
 
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Thanks for the feedback. Hope I can get some more opinions though. Come on FP! I know you readin' this out there. :(
 
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Thanks for the feedback man! and I will post the track up I just need to create the perfect beat for it, which I'm having trouble doing.
 
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Lol no as I just stated out in the post right above yours I'm trying to create the best beat I can for it but I'm having trouble. Thanks for feedback though.
 
where you from? i got some beats you could use if you want?

**** you can have any of my fruity loop beats...i think i got a couple on my myspace...

http://www.myspace.com/dubxero

i never go on myspace so i don't even remember what's there...either way hit me up i can lend you a beat...
 
i'm in baltimore, so i doubt we'll be standing in the same studio anytime soon, but i'll send you some tracks sometime...
 
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