Check...

**LostProfit** · 08-30-2005

Im thinkin of writing some **** to record next weekend since Ive got free studio time. Just wanted some opinions on some ideas ive got down so far...

my mindstate which was once so devilish/
is now a blown kiss from heaven's lips/
homeless, watching the road twist it's yellow bricks/
my bones slip, adapting to elements/
my rapping is evidence/
trapped in the menacing lies/
just waiting to enter your life/
tempting you right to the center of strife/
and you assume that its what lifes meant to be like/
despite all the hardship thats denting your mind/
the large chips, cars, whips, whatever the price/
cant miss and cant skip the sweat and the strive/

if u think its weak so far tell me so i can change it or maybe drop the idea completely lol

easy

**LostProfit** · 08-31-2005

nobody? ive written more since but im gettin the feelin mans wasting time on here...

**CrAcKa-JaCk** · 08-31-2005

seems pretty good, but i mean, if you got studio time, you should prolly have a lil more in store for the booth, thas just my opinion, im usre you do, but you just didnt post it, you gotta go in with the mindset youll get as much done as you can, dont waste free studio time, thas pointless...

but good lyrics so far... just bring some more to the tracks