Drowning... Feedback appreciated

[Statik]

There’s always some sh!t on my mind that’s dragging me down
I’m drowning in bullsh!t and no one’s cracking this frown
I’m lacking all round in the social departments
I say sh!t out my mouth but it’s not what my heart meant

Everything and everyone is toppling over me
I’m down but I’m still dropping sh!t show fully
But that’s just all that some of you know of me
You say you like me but you wouldn’t push out the boat for me
But now I’m openly showing my true feelings in this rap
Even if it’s slowfully I’m still trying giving sh!t back
Is there really any hope for me? I don’t believe
To that special girl out there you know I won’t deceive
You don’t want me but I wont leave see I’m naïve
Perhaps I’m too positive in that I won’t retreat
And it seems that I won’t retrieve my sense
What’s this perceiving achieving? I hate her pretence
But I love the way she dispense her fake loving
I shunt make a defence for her human brake cutting
See I really wanted to stop myself a while ago
Cus I dint want rejection as I know she’d smile a no

There’s always some sh!t on my mind that’s dragging me down
I’m drowning in bullsh!t and no one’s cracking this frown
I’m lacking all round in the social departments
I say sh!t out my mouth but it’s not what my heart meant

There’s always some school work hanging over my a$$
Even as I write this I should be doing my maths
And when I’m due in my class, I’m fuking around outside
But who got the pass? Nearly… I was on the outline
But if I revised and maybe did at least some of my homework
I could of passed and surpassed where the grade point line lurk
But I never get round to my work it’s not important enough
It’s not that it aint tough enough and stuff, I’d just rather have fun and cuss
But fuk! I got stacks of work in racks that quirk to do
To give back to that jerk who’ll only smirk at the work I do
But I do it eventually, even if I give it in three weeks late
You’d think with the time I’ve had that it’d be great
Well it aint, cus I get in it right in the last minute
Give my rushed work in and wait for him to bin it
Question is that now he’s seen it will he deem it good or bad?
Gives me the mark and got and tells me what I should of had

There’s always some sh!t on my mind that’s dragging me down
I’m drowning in bullsh!t and no one’s cracking this frown
I’m lacking all round in the social departments
I say sh!t out my mouth but it’s not what my heart meant

Like I mentioned in the last verse, the curse gets worse
Leaving sh!t to the last minute no exception to this burst
Took over a week when it shouldn’t have taken a day
Am I forsaken to be mistaken when I awaken each day
No one understands the demands my mentality takes
Pressure that spans and expands my morality stakes
Experiences making me think more with originality
Sexuality don’t matter to me its an informality
Aint important what colour your skin is, what’s within is
I just diminish the dimmest that think this skin @#%$
Those that would call a black the “n” word aint racist
They just use the absurd word without a basis
Cus they think it’s a funny joke and say its just a good laugh
Should do a survey on who say’s the word and plot a graph
See I’m even drowning in sh!t and frowning at sh!t that I aint affected by
I was socially unconnected at birth by the people I thought I was respected by


Plz drop some feedback... peace

 

[flareward]

all i will say to this is that you should post ya sh-t more often....ya got skills son and something to say.....ya kept in personal and gave an insight into ya life.....keep posting kid.


out

 

[Ripp]

FEEDBACK

Touching man, i relate to what u said about school
and all that s..t that alwayz fill yo mind up... you know
kinda like a box fulla outdated tasks in your brain with
each one bangin its drum at ya till ya feel your brain
bubblin and u decide to do somethin... f..kin society
man... so much garbage to process in your mind
and most of it **** u don't even wana think about
but they make you... Sh.t yo, its time to get outa line..
this new years, we reseruct, kick the dirt of our life in
a different route, you know.. flow in our own frequence
and seek somethin else then this destructive structure
that leaves too many hangin and even scars those one's sittin
ya know... the one's who sit and think about alternatives
to the screwed up paths invented by pressure essentialy
no one really likes this world as is but not enough can actually
reach in them selves and turn some switches to attend
a new perspective especialy when its offensive and
you oughta be creative... its hard man its hard
**** ain't really no more...
freedom used to be sweet, (as a lil child with no worries)
now formed into structure..
we all stuck deep in concrete.. shiiiiittt... peace...

 

[Trouble]

lovely job!! I really liked that, like to see more from you aswell. Some tight lines in there, but you could see blatantly its from the heart!! awwww I like sensitive men! hehehehe!!