I like the sample, and the way you chopped it, but it needs a slight variation to keep it interesting. And I would lose the huge snare thing...try a subtle snare instead. It's getting like disco where they would play classical music over a disco beat...now every rap song, regardless of the sample or feel of the song, has the Scott Storch snare treatments. I think a subtle snare would make it more listenable.
Your references are some good producers. Two important very things when making a song is the chrous and the intro. Some find it easier to make the chrous of a song 1st. Then take elements out of the chrous to create their verse. If you have a dope intro use that in your song when you want to create a break down to change the track up. There are some many ways of doing this so try working the breakdown in after your 2nd chrous.