'Sampling' might probably be the issue BUT the opposite way.
I keep insisting the sound of the final mix, especially the BD/Bass combo depends A LOT on the raw material and on the quality of the low freq monitoring.
From what I know, the big name House pros use mostly hardware gear or at least first generation drum samples for the basics, sampled straight out of the box. Most commercial or freeware samples (also the ones that come standard with VST drum plugs, FL etc.) are second generation or even later, often heavily processed, some might have even been cut out of some production or loop.
The difference between a 909 kick straight from the vintage Roland box and a clone from Collection XYZ becomes quite obvious on large studio speakers or on good subwoofers. You can literally tell that the original 909 had been optimised back in the days and contains the whole frequency spectrum to work with. Now a sampled drum sound is likely to be lacking something somewhere and/or to contain some artefacts from the way it was processed. Think of it as a raw diamond vs. an already polished one. A raw gem looks fairly bland at first but you can give it the shape you want, whereas the already shaped one can only but get smaller or duller if you try to re-shape it. The same is true - or even more so - for bass sounds.
Without having heard where your problem really is I can only suggest to hunt for the best possible quality for your raw sounds and then only apply processing (disciplined use I like that...) if sounds are clashing.
[We were always lucky to find somebody with hardware gear where we could sample out of the box instead of using commercial samples. It does make a difference.]
The other issue is proper monitoring. I had to painfully learn in the past that mixing on a 6 inch woofer on nearfields is like driving through thick fog at night, bass-wise. There's nothing like feeling the bass when mixing, and also to A-B compare the bass energy to commercial productions.
Try mixing with a good quality subwoofer and you'll feel when the bottom comes alive, believe me. A mate of mine does his final checks through a small club PA and does some DJ-mixing of his tracks with other House tracks in real-time.
From my experience, there really is no magic recipe to get the punch that feels right for you. What works best for me is to loop the track (eq flat) and then step through all the kicks until I hit the one that sits properly with the bass. I shape the bass first cos' the pitch changes in my bass lines are quite drastic, as opposed to the BD. Only at the end I do a bit of eq-ing and compression - if necessary.
** people will forget what you sound like but they'll never forget what you made them feel **