Definitely normal, don't feel bad. We're in the internet era where people can blow up overnight but it takes years. Most established producers joke about how they don't even like listening to their old beats when they first started. Watch beatmaking videos of your favorite producers, make beats and then ask for opinions from others. The more you learn, the better you'll get. it's all bout repetition. There's a book I can't recall the name that says a person must perform at least 10,000 hours on his craft to perfect it. Technology has caused many to avoid good old fashioned hardwork. Embrace the blue collar work ethic in this digital age. Your work ethic is what can separate you from everyone else looking for overnight success. I wasted 2 years using royalty free loops and drum loops before I switched to vinyl and then learned how to make my own drum patterns with my first and only drum machine. I did that for a year and then I learned about FL Studio where I eventually starting to make my drum loops. It takes years for it to all come together. if you really enjoy what you're doing, the passion will keep you going. I did eventually burn out but I did it for 8 intense years. I was just starting to learn things like determinng the root note of a sample and adding basslines which can really enhance a track. Here's my first drum machine. It had a nice crunchy sound. I didn't use the sequencer. I just recorded the drum pattern into Acid. Quantizing the drums was the challenge and I eventually switched to FL studio.